Subject: IJMC - Reasons Why E-Mail Is Like A Penis

From: [email-masked] (Ambassador Dave)
Date: Wed, 9 Aug 1995 22:03:41 -0700

IJMC - Reasons Why E-Mail Is Like A Penis

You know, if the Telecommunications Decency Act passes as is, I will not 
be able to post this again...and it's SO appropriate to this group. Hope
you don't mind the politics, I just hate the TDA...but enjoy the post!
						-dave

                   REASONS WHY E-MAIL IS LIKE A PENIS:

 Some folks have it, some don't.  Those who have it would be devastated
 if it were ever cut off.  They think that those who don't have it are
 somehow inferior.  They think it gives them power.  They are wrong.
 Those who don't have it may agree that it's an nifty toy, but think it's
 not worth the fuss that those who do have it make about it.  Still, many
 of those who don't have it would like to try it.

 It can be up or down.  It's more fun when it's up, but it makes it hard
 to get any real work done.

 In the long-distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information
 considered vital to the survival of the species.  Some people still think
 that's the only thing it should be used for, but most folks today use it
 for fun most of the time.

 Once you've started playing with it, it's hard to stop.  Some people
 would just play with it all day if they didn't have work to do.

 It provides a way to interact with other people.  Some people take this
 interaction very seriously, others treat it as a lark.  Sometimes it's
 hard to tell what kind of person you're dealing with until it's too late.

 If you don't apply the appropriate protective measures, it can spread
 viruses.

 It has no brain of its own.  Instead, it uses yours.  If you use it too
 much, you'll find it becomes more and more difficult to think coherently.

 We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual size
 and influence warrant.

 If you're not careful what you do with it, it can get you in big trouble.

 It has its own agenda.  Somehow, no matter how good your intentions, it
 will warp you behavior.  Later you may ask yourself "why on earth did I
 do that?"

 It has no conscience and no memory.  Left to its own devices, it will
 do the same damn dumb things it did before.

Yet Another E-Mail Sent By The International Junk Mail Clearinghouse (IJMC).
Unless otherwise specified, distribute freely. All questions, comments,
submissions, and requests should be directed to Dave at [email-masked]
       IJMC WebPage - http://gsusgi2.gsu.edu/~stdmdix/ijmc/ijmc.html

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